It's a fine example of the art, and one you can model your own writing on when you come to write your 1,500-word feature story later this semester.
Human interest columnist and feature writer Dave Bakke wrote the story about Jeane Boosinger, 90, and her dog Ally. He misspelled her first name, but otherwise it's a perfect human interest story. I think it has the texture and pacing of a good short story. Let's examine it:
Bakke's lede sets the story in motion right away. Look how he uses quotes to advance the action:
It started out to be a routine evening. Every night before turning in, Jean Boosinger takes her dog, Ally, for a walk. She did the same late last week. This time, things were about to be anything but routine.Kind of makes you want to keep reading, doesn't it? Bakke has a nice, conversational voice. Sounds like he just pulled up a chair and he's talking to you, not writing at you.
Jean, who is 90, lives on a farm near Springfield. She was walking Ally in a field. As in most farm fields, the ground was uneven and rolling. Jean lost her balance and fell. When she did, she felt intense pain in her right arm. She would find out later that her arm was broken in the fall. But all she knew at the time was that it hurt so much she could barely move.
“Nobody was around,” she says. “I didn’t have my cell phone.”
While lying in the field, she examined her options and found out she didn’t have many. She tried using her legs to scoot along the ground, but the pain from her arm stopped that pretty quickly. With her arm useless, she couldn’t pull herself up.
She was in trouble. Soon, it was dark and getting colder. All she had on was a light jacket.
“Then I started hearing the coyotes,” she says, “to the west and to the south. I was just thinking ‘I hope you don’t find me!’ Then the geese started honking. I heard owls as they came out to hunt rabbits.”
And then she passed out.
Mostly, Bakke tells the story from Jeane Boosinger's point of view. Makes sense. That's who told him the story. But for just a little while, he got into the dog's point-of-view: "Usually when a dog hears coyotes howling, especially if they are nearby, one of two things will happen. The dog will run toward the coyotes. Or the dog will run away from the coyotes. Either way, the dog wishes to be elsewhere. Not this time." Trying to write what an animal might think is really hard to pull off. I wouldn't want to try it, and a little bit goes a long way. But Bakke is a pro, and he gets away with it.
He gets right back to the story line, too. "Jean doesn’t remember anything after hearing the owls. And nobody was around to see what happened next. But Ally not only stayed by Jean all night, she climbed onto Jean’s cold body and laid there for hours." And a bit of description: "Ally is a big dog, probably 65-70 pounds. She is big and furry and warm. She is warm like a blanket." Notice how he repeats one-syllable words "big" and "warm?" Think that happened by accident? I don't.
There's more. I'll let you read it without more of my commentary. Then Bakke ends with what I think is an effective kicker:
I asked Jean if she pulled Ally on top of her at some point, but Jean said she hadn’t done that by the time she lost consciousness, so the dog must have done it on her own.Except for a stint with Catholic Times during the 1990s, Dave Bakke has been writing features for the J-R for decades. And it shows. He's a pro. The tag at the end of his column says, "Everybody has a story. The problem is that some of them are boring. If yours is not, contact Dave Bakke at ..." and then it gives his phone number and email address. I don't know who put that at the end of the columns, but I don't like it. I much prefer the quote from H.L. Mencken on our syllabus in COMM 337: "There are no dull subjects. There are only dull writers." But Bakke is a better reporter than the tag at the end of his columns makes him sound.
It is only fitting that Ally saved Jean’s life, because 10 years ago, Jean saved Ally’s. Jean got the dog from Springfield’s Animal Protective League shelter. The animals that come to the shelter are usually sick, injured or stray. The APL doesn’t euthanize, but giving a shelter pet a good home is the same is saving its life.
“She saved me,” Jean says. “We saved each other.”
That makes them even.
And this story is anything but boring.
Here's an opportunity to express yourself in writing! Don Murray talks a lot about the "line" of a story. What does he mean by that? (Use the index to his book and look it up, if you have to.) What, in Murray's terms, is the "line" of Dave Bakke's story here? What does Murray say about "art" and "craft?" Is Bakke's story an example of art or craft? Or both? What literary techniques and/or narrative strategies do you see in the story? Post your thoughts as comments to this blog item.
13 comments:
What an amazing story! Jean and her dog are both heroes. Most people hope to live to 90, while the rest of us dream to be walking our best friend [a dog, Ally] on a daily basis at age 90. Murray talks about the line of a story. From what I understand, he means the layout of the story. He starts with "the line" every time he writes a story. This is a great method. I believe it helps to make a good lede, strong body, and a great "kicker." It also ensures that nothing is boring. We don't like to read boring stuff.
In Bakke's story, the line starts with the background information that he provides about Jean and her dog, Ally. Then there's tension: "As in most farm fields, the ground was uneven and rolling. Jean lost her balance and fell. When she did, she felt intense pain in her right arm. She would find out later that her arm was broken in the fall. But all she knew at the time was that it hurt so much she could barely move."
Conflict: “Nobody was around,” she says. “I didn’t have my cell phone.”
While lying in the field, she examined her options and found out she didn’t have many. She tried using her legs to scoot along the ground, but the pain from her arm stopped that pretty quickly. With her arm useless, she couldn’t pull herself up."
Irony: "Usually when a dog hears coyotes howling, especially if they are nearby, one of two things will happen. The dog will run toward the coyotes. Or the dog will run away from the coyotes. Either way, the dog wishes to be elsewhere. Not this time."
Energy: "But Ally not only stayed by Jean all night, she climbed onto Jean’s cold body and laid there for." The energy is comforting. Without Ally, what would Jean have done?
Play: The sun came up, and she was found by her grandson.
Discovery: Well, I have discovered the "line" of this story. I love this story. It is extremely heart-warming to know that Jean will be OK and her and her dog Ally will continue to spend their lives together.
Music: The voice of the text is happy. I hear melodies of heroism and harmony.
Form: The intro/lede. The strong body. The kicker: Jean saved her dog and her dog saved her. Jean says, "“She saved me,” “We saved each other.” How sweet!
I think this feature story is a combination of both art and craft . Bakke uses craft in the style of his writing. The way he captures the reader's soul is craft. And the knowledge that he has about the story is craft, the way he executes it is the art. The art is his talent and he is an excellent writer.
I noticed a couple techniques that Bakke used to craft a good story. He uses a simile: "She is warm like a blanket." Also, alliteration. "She is big AND furry AND warm." (He saved the most vital term, warm, to list last.) Both of these techniques help to make a great story, one that is unique and not boring.
Allie Ladage
10/4/2011
COMM 3337
Murray explains the concept of the “line” in a story. What he means is that the writer goes through a series of elements when they are writing. The following elements consist of tension, conflict, irony, energy, play, discovery, music, form, and ease. These components help make up the line and Murray says that it is a fragment of language-sometimes a single word, most often a phrase or sequences of words can help writers follow their pattern. I think the line of the story is when Bakke explains the turning point…the dog climbing onto her owner and protecting her from hypothermia. I think that this story mainly consists of craftsmanship instead of art. He wrote the story, but to me, it doesn’t have a lot of artistic value. However, the story does grab the attention of many viewers because it caught mine for sure.
Allie Ladage
10/4/2011
COMM 3337
Murray explains the concept of the “line” in a story. What he means is that the writer goes through a series of elements when they are writing. The following elements consist of tension, conflict, irony, energy, play, discovery, music, form, and ease. These components help make up the line and Murray says that it is a fragment of language-sometimes a single word, most often a phrase or sequences of words can help writers follow their pattern. I think the line of the story is when Bakke explains the turning point…the dog climbing onto her owner and protecting her from hypothermia. I think that this story mainly consists of craftsmanship instead of art. He wrote the story, but to me, it doesn’t have a lot of artistic value. However, the story does grab the attention of many viewers because it caught mine for sure.
The 'line' of a story is similar to the thesis of a paper. Often it is shorter than a sentence and can come in the form of a short headline. The line of this story could be as simple as: Boosinger,90, saves dog; dog returns favor.
Murray states that writing is both an art and a craft. A craft is something that is made by formula and tends to be very similar per each peice of craftwork. Art, however, is designed with originality and creativity.
I would say this story is art, because he follows a much looser format for writing this peice than most peices of a similar subject nature.
When Murray discusses the "line" he is talking about a fragment of language that makes the writer follow through with it. "... an itch I must scratch, a path I must follow, a hint, a clue..."
The "line" in Bakke's article I believe is, "This time, things were about to be anything but routine." This adds tension to the story and encourages the reader to learn more.
Murray considers a craft to be a learned skill, that one can be tuned and molded until the "craftsperson" is satisfied with the outcome. Its ever growing and changing. An art however, is a creative process that also takes time to tune, but it is more tangible. I believe that Dave Bakke's story is more of a art because it adds an artistic flare on a story that could be viewed as ordinary news.
Dave Bakke is very good at setting a scene in this story. He uses the literary technique of imagery to describe the chilling temperatures and the night sky thick with coyote howls. Also, he uses comparative writing to compare Ally the dog to a warm, fuzzy blanket. It's a heart warming story that is different.
"This time, things were about to be anything but routine."
This is where the conflict begins and the line ends. This phrase draws interest. It captivates. this line leads the reader into the story.
The line is drawn. The line must draw. Bakke succeeds in doing both.
Art or Craft?
It is all about perspective. Bakke shifts from the perspective of the storyteller, the hero. There is bark and there is bite, but the k-9 has no voice. Bakke speaks for the furry friend. This shift takes creativity, turning craft into art. Is this article art or craft? It is both. It begins as one and transforms into the next.
Art and Craft are almost the same thing in writing. The writer is showing what he/she craft is in writing. Informing the reader or making the reader want to read. The art of writing is more abstract. The writer will write on what they know and how they will put what they know into words. The words are what make writer have his/her own voice. The writer in the dog story uses both art and craft real well. This article shows how art and craft gives this writer his or her own voice.
''Art is what you can get away with'' ~Andy Warhol~
I really enjoed the story, it helps the reader connect to the article. It brings out a lot of emotion and feeling from the connection the lady has to the dog (ally)and how the dog has so much love toward the owner she would never leave her side even though she was scared to death of the coyotes.
I believe the "line" of the story is almost like the iattention getter. Something you read thats hooks you in and makes you want to continue to read the rest of the article or story.
This article could be both an "art" or a "craft" but i think it is more of an art style of writting because it is a more fluent style of writting.
writing is art and art is writing. The best part of both is the artist is always right and others can throw opinions. Thats what makes a craft also. You are the creator and have the imagination. You are to help others see inside your imagination.
The Line in this article is "This time, things were about to be anything but routine." this puts tension into his words that he is using you know that something is coming that was not expected to occur.Murrary consideres a craft to be a skill and can be molded to fit what it is meant to be. He wrote this so people would read it and understand what has happened and how saving one life has now saved another!
I believe the Line in this article is when the conflict begins. "This time, things were about to be anything but routine." this gives the story depth. Murrary thinks a craft can be a skill and can be anything you make your skill to be. As communication Majors our skill is writing. Our words are art went we apply this to our skill set. It is a way to be expressive. This was a good story and had a great message.
The line of the story is when Bakke talks about Jean's background then goes into the accident that happened to her.
I believe that this article is an expample of both art and craft.
Words are brought into the story by the writer and Bakke keeps the the reader on track to read the whole article.
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