COMM 209: First story, back-to-school

Words printed in boldface and marked with an asterisk (or star) I will briefly define at the bottom of the blog post. You should learn them and be able to use them. They're standard buzzwords you'll hear -- or see -- around most newspapers.

Here's your first assignment: write a "back-to-school story" on the beginning of spring semester at Springfield College and Benedictine University. Interview at least three people and quote them in the story. Due at the beginning of class Monday, Jan. 28.

You'll do a better job with these stories if you model them after real-world professional writing. So here are some links. Most of the back-to-school stories on the Web at the moment are from South Africa, where it's late summer and school starts this week. But I did find a story about the first day of spring semester at Jamestown Community College in upstate New York. It's by Alexander Geroud, a reporter for the local Post-Courier newspaper. So we'll start by analyzing it.

Look at the *lede. First a paragraph or *graf that sums it up, lots of people coming back to school, and leads directly into a quote:

1/15/2008 - Jamestown Community College’s parking lots, bookstore, student union and classrooms were full of students Monday as the 2008 spring semester officially started.

‘‘Everything seemed to go smoothly today,’’ said Nelson Garifi, JCC executive director of marketing. ‘‘This is always a day of flux. ... There’s a lot of activity going on.’’

Kreig Elicker, JCC registrar, said the day was busy, but not as bad as the first day of the college’s fall semester when many new students are on campus.

‘‘Busy as usual,’’ Elicker said, when asked how the day had been so far. ‘‘We try and accommodate people. We’ve been pretty busy helping students with adjustments with their schedules.’’

See the pattern for the first four grafs? Summary statement, quote. Summary, quote. This story could have been polished a little, by the way. But don't worry about that. Just look at the way it's put together.

Let's move down in the story and look at another example. By the way, can you read through the lines and see how Geroud reported it? He talks to the officials (probably by phone, by the way, since most real-world reporting is done over the phone). Then he visits the bookstore. Let's follow him.

In the campus store, students searched for books for their upcoming classes. Other students stood in line to purchase textbooks and school supplies. Cindy Guiffreda, director of the campus store, said there were four registers open during the day, and employees were trying to move students through the checkout process as quickly as they could.

‘‘We’ve been very busy today. Usually we’re busy on the second day,’’ Ms. Guiffreda said.

While sitting with a group of friends in the student union, Ashley Adams, Scott Barton and Jaxi Tynan said they were enjoying the opportunity of being able to catch up with old friends and meet new people.

‘‘It feels good to be back with friends,’’ Barton said.

Besides sitting in on the wrong English class, Ms. Tynan, who was starting her first semester at JCC, said everyone on the campus was ready to offer her assistance with any problem.

‘‘It’s my first day,’’ she said. ‘‘Everyone here is really helpful. They’re really nice.’’

Why did she choose JCC?

‘‘My mom kicking me in the butt,’’ Ms. Tynan said. ‘‘Her telling me to get out of the house and do something.’’

See how it's put together. A paragraph of description seguing into transition as he introduces the bookstore manager, then a quote. Look at what comes next: Description, transition, quote. Notice how the transition identifies the person being quoted? See the pattern? Look at the rest of the story: Transition, quote, another transition, another quote.

Think of Mardi Gras beads on a really cheap necklace. Quotes are what give life and interest to a news story. They're like the beads, and they're strung together like beads on the necklace with one or two grafs of summary, description and/or transition in between.

Here's a link to another kind of back-to-school story by staff writer Hendrick Mphande in The Herald, an English-language paper in Port Elizabeth, South Africa. He interviews local public figures on what their first day of school was like, but he puts the story together the same way. After a throw-away lede recalling "that traumatic first day of school," Mphande says: "Schools in coastal regions start tomorrow, and parents are bracing themselves for emotional scenes from little ones with tears running down their cheeks, protesting against being entrusted to strangers." And then he strings together quotes from his interviews. Lots of interviews, by the way. Shows initiative. I like that.

Let's look at a few grafs toward the middle of Mphande's story:

Cyclist Anriette Schoeman said she could not help feeling scared on the day her mother took her to a school in Burgersdorp.

“I guess I was overwhelmed by the thought that I was small and going into this big place, coupled with the fact that the teachers looked very strict.”

Schoeman said she quickly made friends with other girls as she had attended a nursery school.

“Parents taking children to school for the first time must assure them it is just the first step to greater things in life,” she said.

The thought of being away from his parents and being taught under a mango tree in Durban proved traumatic for Port Elizabeth businessman Boya Chetty, who just wanted to go home.

“It was such a horrible day for me. I just wanted to go home, but I did not know the way. I really did not enjoy my first day at school, and in those days we were not exposed to early education,” said Chetty.

I love the bit about the mango tree in Durban, a much larger city than Port Elizabeth, but I doubt mangoes are considered exotic there. Still, I like the way Mphande introduces his quotes. Here's another nice one:

Steve Newman, renowned South African guitarist, currently living in Uniondale in the Southern Cape, said: “I remember my first day of school. I was sitting next to a guy who was crying. He became my friend, then I left the school and hooked up with him later when we were about 12 and he started me off playing the guitar. His name was Raymond Yeo.

“My teacher was very nice. I kissed a girl sitting behind me and the other children told the teacher. Then she asked me to give her a kiss as well, so I did. I had to. I thought that was a very good way for her to handle it, rather than making me feel guilty or whatever.”

What's the key here? When you write your stories, use lots of quotes. The main point: News writing isn't just about putting words together. It's about reporting. Without the reporting, you can't do the writing. Never forget that.

Jargon
Lede. Pronounced like it's spelled. It leads the reader into a story. It can be the first graf (see below) in a hard news story, or it can be kind of a "hook" or attention-getter in the first two or three grafs. Newspapering old-timers spelled it that way because "lead" (pronounced like "ledd" or the gray metal) was the graphic designers' word for vertical space (created by using lead shims) in a newspaper story. It kept down confusion.

Graf. Short for paragraph. I don't know why. And I don't know why it's spelled "graf," either (unless it's so a graf isn't confused with a "graph" that gives a graphic representation or facts of figures). You'll hear both of these words used all the time.